A Great Deal
by blood-junky
Summary: Eiri's never letting Shuichi do the grocery shopping again.


_Eiri's never letting Shuichi do the grocery shopping again._

* * *

_Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick._

_Bam. Bam. Bam. Bam. Bam._

Eiri Yuki banged his head against his desk in sync with the irritatingly consistent ticking of the clock above his head, which seemed to get louder each minute. His deadline was looming over him like the blade of a guillotine; the _perfect_ time for writer's block to seize hold of his mind. On top of that, he was starving. Shuichi had set out for the grocery store hours ago. Of course, while he waited for his lover to return, Eiri had raided the fridge for anything even partially edible, but all he had found were milk, an empty can of beer and a bag of celery, which everyone with half a brain knew Eiri utterly despised. He had drunk some of the milk in hopes that it would satisfy his hunger for a little while, but found himself gagging on it; turned out it had expired two months previous. And they were out of coffee, too.

Damn it.

Eiri had attempted calling Shuichi an hour ago, to demand where the hell he was, but wound up chucking the phone at the wall in anger and sheer desperation when a familiar jingle alerted him to the fact that Shuichi had forgotten his cell phone in the living room. And by God was he hungry...

But, unfortunately, hunger was but the minor of the two things that were driving him up the wall. To his annoyance, for some reason his libido had increased tenfold; it was driving him mad and there was little he could do about it. This had been going on for a fortnight, and he did not know why.

Though he suspected it had something to do with that romance film he and Shuichi had watched a few weeks previous; the damned thing had followed him into his dreams, for God's sake.

Whatever the case, it was starting to get a little out of hand; even Mr. Meow was starting to look good.

Though he'd never go _that_ far.

Now, Eiri didn't believe in "doing it himself", nor did he any longer feel the need to check into a hotel with the first woman he saw. But damn it, it was tempting him!

'Course, he had many a time planned on talking Shuichi into intimacy; didn't seem like it would be too hard. But the damn brat always passed out the second his head hit the pillow, foiling any and all of Eiri's plans for nookie.

And so the whole day he had been trying his damned hardest to keep his mind away from even remotely sexual thoughts, but it proved to be easier said than done.

It had been a tough month for him.

He lifted his head off the desk and stared at the computer screen in aggravation, wishing the paragraph he was trying his hardest to write would just appear so he could curl up on the bed and go to sleep…or eat, at least.

He had actually forced himself to type something, but everything he wrote wound up sounding stupid, bland, and insincere, and he slammed angrily on the backspace.

He looked up at the clock and cursed it silently. _Four hours_! Where the hell was that brat?

Then the writer was filled with a brief euphoria when his ears picked up a faint _thunk_, and he heard the front door creak open in the living room. He nearly leapt out of his chair, but as he neared his study door composed himself as to not overexcite the brat.

_Just keep cool_, he had instructed himself. _And everything will be_ fine.

He entered the living room to find Shuichi hauling in a countless number of bags from the building's hallway, though not all were from the grocery store. He figured most had been from that new store in the mall Shuichi had been going on about wanting to check out but could never find the time to. Least he knew what had taken the brat so long.

"Hi, Yuki!" Shuichi greeted jubilantly, though breathlessly as he set the last set of bags down. Eiri tried not to fidget when Shuichi's too-big white jacket slid down his shoulder and revealed the small tank top and delicate collar bone beneath. He looked so warm, and he hadn't touched that boy in the longest time…

Eiri quickly shook his head.

"Sorry I took so long," The singer went on. "You know that store I was telling you about? Well, after I did the grocery shopping I couldn't help myself; I had to check it out." He beamed. "They have _everything_ in there! Oh, and by the way, I snagged some Cheez-Its for you. I know how much you like those."

Shuichi dug through a random bag and tossed the red and yellow box at Eiri, who ripped it open and eagerly inhaled fist fuls of its contents. Finally, something other than his cheek that he could _chew_!

Shuichi looked slightly taken aback at Eiri's near savage devouring of the cheese crackers, but then smiled.

"Again, I'm sorry. I know you must be starved." He unzipped his jacket and tossed it on the sofa, causing Eiri to pause in the midst of his small feast and gaze longingly at the lean muscle of Shuichi's back. He swallowed the crackers roughly and set the box aside, his hunger vanishing suddenly. He was quite amazed at this, actually.

He jammed his hands into his pockets and tried to compose himself as he watched the singer shift through the bags.

The little singer giggled. "Their prices are amazing, too!"

Eiri sighed, and finally found his voice. "What the hell did you buy there, anyway?"

Shuichi shrugged his handsome little shoulders. "Oh, you know. Clothes and…things."

Eiri raised an eyebrow. "Really." He reached into a random bag and produced a skinny open knit fishnet shirt. Confused, he held it up to his chest by its shoulders, and then looked at the singer. "What the hell is this for?"

Shuichi looked up quickly from the two mugs he was pulling out of plastic wrapping.

"Oh, that's for the show coming up soon. We have a few gothic rock numbers that we'll be playing at the concert and we're going to dress for the occasion."

"Why does it have tears in it?"

"They're made for the outfit."

Eiri scoffed. "What, will you be wearing eyeliner and leather pants, too?"

"Yes." Shuichi answered simply.

Eiri suddenly hated himself for asking. He took a deep breath as he tried not to imagine the singer prancing about the stage wearing such a thing, the lights glistening off his tan, sweaty body as he pulled at the tattered collar of the revealing shirt, craning his neck as he screamed the lyrics into the microphone in pure ecstasy…

_Damn it_! Eiri tossed the shirt aside and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Oh!" Shuichi exclaimed suddenly. "And I got a great deal on condoms!"

He got a great deal on _what_?

The singer picked up the box and tossed it at his lover, who caught it hesitantly. This was not helping.

"They were on special."

Just as he opened his mouth to protest, a flash went off. Through the blobs in his vision, Eiri made out Shuichi turning a throw away camera around in his hands, and then shrug as he tossed it into the pile of bags and paper.

"I bought a few cameras, too. Just because."

Eiri quickly hid the box behind a pillow on the couch.

"And what else…some slinkies!" The magenta haired boy pulled out a rainbow slinky toy and chinked it together. "These things are so much fun to _stretch_ and play with!" He giggled. A drop of sweat dribbled down Eiri's temple.

"We also have…an electric blanket…some new seat covers for your Mercedes…oh! And some new underwear." He pulled out a pack of black boxer briefs and set them aside. Eiri forced his eyes away from it.

"I also got these really cool platforms for the show…ah, but you wouldn't care."

Again with the imagery! It becoming more than he could bear.

"Say, Yuki," Shuichi began, turning a small, handheld mirror around in the light. "You think we could go to the arcade later?"

Eiri looked confused. "Why?"

Shuichi rolled his eyes. "Do you really have to ask? To have some fun, silly! We could play whack-a-mole or air hockey!"

Silence from Eiri.

Shuichi mistook his blank expression. "You know, whack-a-mole! Where the little moles poke their heads in and out of the holes and you hit them on the head with the mallet!"

That did it. Groaning, Eiri spun around and hastily made for his study, slamming the door and locking it.

Shuichi's wide eyes shifted about the room in confusion. A moment later, Eiri burst from his study, stomped down the hall, snatched the Cheez-Its box off the floor and stomped back to his study, slamming the door again.

Shuichi sat amongst the bags with the most befuddled of expressions on his face, blinking as he stared into the hallway.

"...Was it something I said?"

* * *

_Well...there it is, my first one shot. I know its not the best, but...the idea came to me sometime around midnight and I found it to be very cute; too cute to ignore, so yea. _

_Don't forget the Cheez-Its, Eiri. D:_

_I do not own Gravitation. _

_Gravitation is (C) Maki Murakami._

_And hey...if you don't like it, don't flame, but if you have some helpful, non-flamelike critiques for me, they are encouraged. I'm new at this. _


End file.
